they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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