there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
