4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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