OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
