your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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