you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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