I'm gonna have a badass scar
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
When did angry sex become our thing?
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
