I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I think your dad took our porno
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Randomize
