i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
