xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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