just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
