It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Who wears a wallet chain?!
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Do vagina's smell?
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize