I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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