Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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