I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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