I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
