Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
