you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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