its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
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