wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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