1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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