well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
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