let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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