that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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