Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
