Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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