So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
