Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize