I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
