For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
