That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
