I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
