During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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