she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Terrible idea I love it
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
