Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I'm at about main and main street
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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