Too much gin, very little bucket
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
