i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
