Me. At least after what I've been through.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
