i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize