We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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