I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
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I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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