You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
