she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
