She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
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