I should be sponsored by Trojan
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
