Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
