I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Randomize
