ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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