Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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