You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I need to align my fucking chakras
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
