if you like me you must not know who I am
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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